A Degree of Seperation Tale: From A Sarah Palin Porn Spoof To A Reporter’s Assault And Battery

Asshattery, F*ck the Republicans!!!, Political Smackdown 2008!!!, Revenge of the Sexbots, The War on Sex/Sluts/Gays/Whatever, Wingnutteria October 19th, 2008

Just when you think this election season can’t get much whackier….or the New Brownshirt Mafia fueled by the hate of the right wing can’t get any worse….

On Friday, a reporter for the local Greensboro (North Carolina) newspaper News & Record named Joe Killian, who also hosts his own personal blog caled Automatic Writing and contributes to a column on media and culture for his home paper called Culture Shock, was assigned to cover a political rally for the McCain-Palin campaign at Elon College. Considering how such rallies have become fuel for some of the worst behavior (as in catcalls for Obama’s death and baiting liberals and others not quite so glowing of McSame and Sarah Braun’s policies as “anti-American”), I’m sure that they were expecting more than their usual share of fireworks.

Well, they got some…a bit more than they expected. I’ll let Mr. Killian take the story from there (from his blog):

It was an interesting day and I’m glad to have had the experience. But now here I sit, sunburned and sore with a throbbing headache and an aching leg.

Why? Because a McCain-Palin supporter tried to kick my ass.

I know what you’re thinking.

But no, I didn’t have it coming.

[...]

After the speech was over I was walking around getting peoples’ reactions to it when I wandered into several clusters of sign waving Obama supporters outside the stadium area. They were surrounded by McCain-Palin folks and both sides were yelling at each other.

I sidled up to one of the Obama supporters and asked why they were there, what they were trying to accomplish.

As he was telling me a large, bearded man in full McCain-Palin campaign regalia got in his face to yell at him.

“Hey, hey,” I said. “I’m trying to interview him. Just a minute, okay?”

The man began to say something about how of course I was interviewing the Obama people when suddenly, from behind us, the sound of a pro-Obama rap song came blaring out of the windows of a dorm building. We all turned our heads to see Obama signs in the windows.

This was met with curses, screams and chants of “U.S.A” by McCain-Palin folks who crowded under the windows trying to drown it out and yell at the person playing the stereo.

It was a moment of levity in an otherwise very tense situation and so I let out a gentle chuckle and shook my head.

“Oh, you think that’s funny?!” the large bearded man said. His face was turning red. “Yeah, that’s real funny…” he said.

And then he kicked the back of my leg, buckling my right knee and sending me sprawling onto the ground.

From my position there I saw the bottoms of a number of feet almost accidentally stomping me to death as the two political camps screamed back and forth, the music continued to blare and some of the Obama crowd moved the large bearded man and his friends away. When I was helped to my feet the bearded man was walking away quickly.

For a moment I considered running the bloated, twelve-sandwich eating prick down and beating the living hell out of him…and then I remembered that I’m a reporter, how much I enjoy being gainfully employed and how hard it would be to keep my job if I got into a fistfight with a guy at a political rally.

So instead I limped off to try to find a security guard or cop.

When I did the guy was nowhere to be found.

“He’s this big fat guy with a brown beard and he’s wearing a McCain-Palin shirt and hat,” I said.

And then felt like an idiot. I was surrounded by people who fit that description.

So I simply limped to my car fuming.

Oh, Mr. Killan, be really lucky you weren’t Black, because I’m figuring that they would do a heck of a  lot worse….like scream “Sit down, boy” like some McPalin Brownshirt wannabes did to a photographer at a previous rally.

Now…here is where the story goes from the outrageous to the sublime.

One of Mr. Killan’s colleagues who was at the same rally was a political writer named Mark Binker; when he recounted his perspective of the incident and managed to criticize the GOP sponsors of the event for allowing it to get out of hand, he got a lot of commentary and feedback. (Binker is pretty much a conservative who leans toward McCain/Palin, BTW….yet, to his credit, he seemed just as appalled by the whole incident.)

Well, one of the respondents to his post happened to be Tony Wilkins, who is the media chair of the Guilford County GOP and the main sponsor of the rally….and he decided to drop this bomb as to attempt to justify the assault and battery of Killian:

There were at least four angry confrontations there today. Those four all involved what appeared to be college age kids. Much cursing. Much anger.
One group of young black students? were confrontational to the crowd leaving. The only part of what they were saying that I understood was “you white folks”. I’m wondering if the Dems aren’t in some respect giving their supporters license for this sort of crap.
I talked to the guy that dropped Killian to the ground. He said he didn’t like the Pail [sic] porn post.

Ahhh….what’s that again??  Did he mean “the Palin porn post”??

As in, the well publicized porn spoof/sex satire of Governor Palin being released by HUSTLER Films and Larry Flynt called Who’s Nailin’ Paylin? (WARNING: Links to adult explicit content, definitely NSFW) The one where the absolutely gorgeous (understatement alert!!!) Lisa Ann (who also happens to have her own talent agency for porn performers, Lisa Ann Talent Management) plays the title role?? The one with Nina Hartley playing a spoof of Hillary Clinton and Jada Fire playing Condi Rice in a all-girl three-way with “Serra Paylin”??

And THAT’S what Wilkins says justifies dewd kicking Killian’s shin??

WOW.

Oh..but hold on….it gets even better. Turns out, the link that Killian article that so angered our Brownshirt wannabe goes to a post he did at Future Shock which consists of all of these words:

It was only a matter of time.  From the Frisky.com story: [...]

…followed by an excerpt from a post at Susannah Breslin’s blog Frisky.com breaking the story of the upcoming Hustler spoof.

But, you know..it just may be Tony Wilkins imposing his own biases in this…since one look at the thread discussion about the Palin post thread reveals that Wilkins has a bit of an issue with both the Palin spoof and Killan’s reporting in general:

At the top of this post: News-Record.com.
IMO, he should post this crap on his personal blog.
I’ll see if the advertiser(s) agree.

[...]

Joe K., Joe, and Chris,
Based on your logic above are you agreeing that it would be okay for Killian to post the actual video in question when it’s produced?
Ah oh! Did that cross the line?
Who serves as the “line” president?
And all of you think it’s proper for a revolving ad to display for Wesleyan Christian Academy on the same page as this post?

[....]

I’ll attempt to clarify my opinion once more Chris.
I do not think the graphic description in the post is appropriate for a community standards based newspaper. It’s my opinion, we disagree, get over it.
It’s agreed above by some that Joe would not post the video itself. So there was a line drawn there. I would have drawn the line behind the graphic description or posted it on a personal blog.
It’s obviously unimportant to JR. Not a word from him.

[...]

Of course, the fact that Killian only posted a link to a site that posted only the press release announcing the production of the video does nothing to chill down Wilkins’ rage. Maybe he just invented the Who’s Nailin’ Paylin? connection just to take a swipe at Killian for his “liberal” bias?? Or..perhaps he just sent his large friend over to give Killian some payback for not being a “fair and balanced” reporter??

Or, maybe, Wilkins isn’t really involved in this at all, and this was just a dude who simply got hot under the collar at what he was hearing, and Killian just happened to be the unlucky guy in his way.

Who knows???

All I know is that all this does is to hope for a nice 350 - 400 EV ass-whopping by Obama all the more on November 4th….and if I ever get the chance, I most certainly will have my DVD copy of Who’s Nailin’ Paylin?? on my ‘puter screen that night, celebrating the fall of Reaganism/Bushism and Lisa Ann, Jada, and Nina locking lips and clits, too, as a bonus.

In the meantime, my advice to any media thinking about going to a McSame/CaribouBarbie rally: Travel in groups…and bullet-proof vests and mace would be a decent investment.

[P.S.: Special hat tip to Pam Spaulding over at Pandagon for breaking the story; her brief summation of the entire affair is here.


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